Caregiver burnout is a well-known phenomenon – to people who are not suffering from it, that is. When you are working as a carer, you tend to be working long, physically demanding hours, and sometimes it can be hard to acknowledge that you’re tired, let alone admit that you might be suffering from burnout.
Finances might be tight, time short, and you may not be able to plan your day or your week properly, having to react to the needs of your loved one as issues arise. Because of these unique pressures, caregiver burnout can manifest itself in physical, emotional and mental exhaustion.
Some symptoms of such burnout include withdrawing from family and friends, feeling irritable, losing interest in hobbies, changes in appetite and weight, erratic sleep patterns, and getting ill more frequently.
How To Avoid Caregiver Burnout
But your caring work is vitally important, and your loved one needs you to be there for them. The stresses of the job cause fear, frustration and worry, and it can become overwhelming at times. In such cases, looking after number one is just as important as looking after your loved one; here are 8 self-care and support tips for carers to help prevent caregiver burnout.
Ask For Help
Proud, humble people (as caregivers so often are) can struggle to ask for anything. Asking for help with your loved one – your relative, your responsibility – can be chastening.
But there are assistance programmes, respite homes and grants that can help you to cope with everything from your finances to your own mental health. No one will judge you for asking for help; caring is an impossibly hard job, after all.
Use Respite Care
If you have a respite centre close to your home, don’t be afraid to use it. You can enjoy a couple of hours of distraction-free shopping, take a nap, or use the time to phone a friend…those everyday things that you deserve!
The most simple form of respite care sees your loved one temporarily move into residential care, which is akin to a hotel stay, but with the typical infrastructure of the residential or nursing home.
If the respite centre does overnight stays, you could even treat yourself to a spa day – or simply an untroubled day with no alarms dragging you out of bed or away from what you are doing. Sounds blissful, right?
Use the NHS’ online service to find carer’s breaks and respite care in your area.
Don’t Beat Yourself Up
Carer’s guilt is a common phenomenon. But remember that no one can give more than their all, and the fact that you’re dedicating this chapter of your life to a loved one is selfless and generous. Don’t be too hard on yourself for feeling worn out or needing external assistance and support, whether that’s in the form of the best home care services in your area, or simply a sympathetic ear when you need one.
Find Support
There are plenty of in-person and online support groups for carers, and joining one of these can be such a relief. Even if you lurk on the fringes of a social media group, realising that others have the same doubts and fears as yourself can make you feel better about your own supposed shortcomings. Check out the Carers UK Forum, which is part of the UK’s only national member charity for carers, in particular.
As well as this, other members of the group could have valuable advice and tips for you on how to cope, who to reach out to and more. A friendly voice can make the difference between a terrible day and a good one, so don’t be afraid to see what’s out there.
Carers UK also host weekly online ‘Care for a Cuppa’ meetups for all caregivers in the UK, as well as a Listening Support Service for those needing more formal advice from professionals within the care world.
You should also check out the Carers Trust, who provide online support for carers, enabling them to access help, advice and breaks from caring. And finally, the NHS has a dedicated Social Care and Support Guide with lots of information on the support carers are entitled to.
Look After You
When your loved one has complicated needs, taking time for yourself can seem like a luxury. Self-care certainly isn’t a luxury; you cannot care for them if you are ill yourself. Make sure you look after four main factors essential to good health: eat right, drink enough water, get some gentle exercise every day, and ensure you get enough sleep. Being healthy and alert will help your caring duties seem less onerous.
Read Up & Be Realistic
If your loved one has a diagnosis that has a progression of decline, read up on the condition so you know what to expect as the illness progresses or worsens. Working your hardest for someone only to have their decline worsen can make you feel guilty. But age-related diseases have their own timetable and understanding that there is nothing you could have done can stave off that heart-rending guilt that you otherwise might feel.
Support Line offer a useful directory of illness-specific support lines and useful websites for carers.
Charitable Grants
Your time is precious, and you don’t want to waste any by chasing rainbows, but there are a number of charities who offer grants to help carers cope with their duties.
These range from disability vehicles so you can take your loved one out and about, to help and advice with finances, all the way to home improvements that make it easier for you to cope at home. Spend a little time each week seeing what’s out there, putting your name down when you are eligible.
The Carers Trust have a useful guide here on the grants and discounts that could be available to you.
Organise A Carer’s Assessment
It’s also a good idea to contact adult social services at your local council to organise a carer’s assessment. This assessment sees someone from the council’s dedicated team come for a face-to-face chat with you about how you’re coping. They will then recommend various support networks and options available to make your life easier.
The Bottom Line
Looking after someone 24/7 is not a full-time job; it’s actually more like 3 full time jobs! Don’t do this thing alone; there is support out there available and tailored to your specific needs.