Whether you’re getting down on one knee, shouting your love from the rooftops, or making a mature, mutual decision, proposing to your partner has to be up there with one of the most important and memorable moments of your life.
Planning that proposal, then, can be as exciting as it is daunting, with many people wanting the big moment to reflect their relationship and their unique definition of love, marriage and the rest. Choosing a gorgeous location, the moment to do it, the script you’ll follow (or the spontaneity you’ll rely on), and the ring itself are all key decisions that have to be made.
If you’re feeling the weight of it all, read on to gather some inspiration from fellow Brits before popping the question.
The Ring
There are many factors that can impact on both the romanticism and practicality of your proposal, but central to it all is the ring. It’s arguably the aspect of the proposal that people have the most anxiety about, and it’s something you want to get just right.
When choosing your engagement ring, remember the 4Cs (colour, clarity, carat, and cut) and take your partner’s personality and style into account. Don’t be distracted by trends; this is something your partner will wear for the rest of their life, so it has to have lasting meaning.
For those who don’t want to spend their monthly pay cheque on the ring (a post-pandemic engagement trend of thrift is fast gaining traction), remember that size only matters if it’s important to your fiancé – and there’s definitely an innuendo in there somewhere, if only we could find it.
Search for something special and with unique symbolism to the two of you, investigate where the stone came from, and don’t be afraid to think outside the box with design.
It can be daunting to get all this right, but with research by engagement ring specialists F.Hinds finding that only 17% of Brits would be put off a proposal if there was no ring, the pressure isn’t perhaps quite as heavy-going as we previously thought. You could, instead, go ring-shopping together, which is rather romantic and respectful in its own way, don’t you think?
A Shared Or Private Moment?
Depending on who you are as individual people and as a couple, you need to decide whether to pop the question in front of loved ones or with just the two of you present. Public proposals can range from getting down on one knee at a family BBQ (just no) or doing it in a crowded restaurant, all the way to popping the question at a huge football match with thousands of onlookers. It’s perfect for couples who enjoy being the centre of attention and prefer big displays of affection, but it’s certainly not for everyone.
In fact, it’s not for that many people; before you plan a public proposal, it might be helpful to know that 74% of Brits would be put off if their partner proposed to them in public. 89% of residents in Belfast would also turn down public proposals, whilst 36% of Brits admitted that a professional photographer being there would also put them off.
Read: 6 of the most romantic places to propose in 2022
Timing
It’s also crucial to know where your partner stands in the relationship and if they are actually ready and willing to get engaged in the first place. If you’re not sure how you feel about getting engaged, ask yourself whether you’re afraid to visualise your future with your partner, whether you feel your most comfortable around them, if your communication is effective and if you’ve survived rough spots and come out stronger.
Timing is really important. In fact, 47% of Brits said that being proposed to too early would make them reconsider the relationship. Every relationship is different, so have fun with your proposal and make it an everlasting memory.
Keep Those Nerves Under Control
You want to enjoy this special moment as much as your partner, but so many proposals, however well planned or coordinated, are ruined by the nerves of the proposer. Make sure you keep those nerves under control so the whole occasion goes as effortlessly as possible.
Though the virtues of Dutch courage are extolled by some, you don’t want to risk being sloppy or losing your balance on one knee; you want to remember this, after all! Instead, stay smooth and suave and save the champers for after you’ve popped the question, and learn a few simple breathing exercises to keep you cool under pressure.
Good luck, and we hope to receive our wedding invitation soon!
And now for the happily-ever-afters; playing the long game here, check out these tips on how to bring new passion into your marital life as you age, and keep that candle burning!