HOW TO STOP WEDDING PLANNING FROM TAKING OVER YOUR LIFE

Ideal if you’re feeling overwhelmed by wedding planning

Did you know that wacky wedding nightmares are a real thing? You know, that one where you’re walking up the aisle nude? Or how about the one where your partner’s lost the ring? Or, that almost nightly dream where you turn into a wedding cake and start eating yourself? That last one just us? Oh well…

Indeed, wedding anxiety dreams are a genuine occurrence in the lead up to the big day and are, in fact, a symptom of stress.  

If this feels all too familiar, then it’s a tell tale sign that wedding planning is taking over your life. Those nightmares are likely a sign that you’re stressing yourself out and giving yourself too much to do, and that’s no way to enjoy the lead up to your wedding. Instead, communicate, delegate and moderate, with these tips on how to stop wedding planning from taking over your life.  

YOU CAN RELY ON EACH OTHER, UH HUH

And if you can’t, then you probably shouldn’t be getting married… 

‘The happy couple’; the clue’s in the billing don’t you think? As the saying goes, ‘two heads are better than one’, and this is certainly true for sharing the wedding planning load fairly and amicably. 

Although tradition dictates that one half tends to take on more of the planning than the other, the wedding shouldn’t be a one-person effort. If both of you are ‘all in’ on the wedding planning, then you can manage your time more efficiently, and stop it from taking over both your lifes. By ensuring you have the full support of your soon-to-be spouse, you’re effectively doubling the time you have to plan. As Dolly intoned; ‘’Tender love is blind, it requires a dedication’’. She’s right, you know.

Read: Things no one tells you about planning your wedding (until now!)

GET YOUR FAMILY INVOLVED

If you want to keep your parents busy and focused on the event without them meddling in all the finer details, then carefully choose some task specific roles which they could complete, keeping them busy and occupied in the run up. 

Should your father be a skilled baker, for instance, you could ask him to make the cake. If your mum has an eye for aesthetics and an encyclopaedic knowledge of all things floral, then of course she’d be perfect for helping out with the flower arranging. Rather than leaving the planning in the (interfering) hands of the gods, make work for idle ones instead. 

Read: 5 tips for involving your folks, IDEAL for managing your parents’ expectations during the lead up to your wedding 

DELEGATE TASKS TO FRIENDS 

Teamwork makes the dream work, after all, and no wedding organised by one person alone ever went smoothly. Instead, make the most of your friend’s varied skill set, getting the best out of everyone with clear instructions, constructive criticism and plenty of praise.

Some things you can ask your bridesmaids and friends to help with include: 

  • Any DIY wedding projects
  • Help setting up the event
  • Bridal Emergency Kit
  • Sleepover essentials for the night before the wedding 

This means you can concentrate on the little things, be it creating personalized wedding gifts for your other half, or designing a table plan that keeps Uncle Kevin well away from his ex-wife, Aunty Pauline. 

KEEP YOUR WEDDING IN PERSPECTIVE

Sometimes when you’re spending 99.9% of the time planning, you can feel like a hamster running around in its wheel with endless tasks to complete and never a moment to take stock. While being overly productive right now may feel necessary,  if your wedding workload is draining and crushing you, then it’s time to put things in perspective. 

Your wedding is just one day. Will your wedding guests really remember those stunning floral arrangements as you walk down the aisle? Probably not as they will be focused on you and your husband-to-be. However, will your mother remember that lovely handwritten note thanking them for everything? Most definitely, yes. 

It’s all about prioritising the things that really matter here, and not sweating the small stuff. Here’s a list of other things your guests may not care about, so don’t fuss about them: 

  • Wedding invitations and wedding calligraphy
  • Ridiculously overpriced flowers 
  • A choreographed first dance
  • How the food is served – be it buffet or seated, you’re providing everyone with a free meal! 
  • Wedding favours
  • The cake 

Things they may well care about:

  • Having a great time filled with love, affection and appreciation
  • …that’s all

Read: 5 things worth spending your budget on

HUMP DAYS ARE FOR WEDDING PLANNING 

Wednesdays, the middle of the week, otherwise known as ‘hump day’. Why not put this mid-week day that’s often associated with a lack of ambition and motivation to good use and schedule it in for wedding planning?  

One of the best ways to prevent your wedding from taking over your life is to allow yourself the time you need in order to complete each task.  Setting some time aside on a specific day each day when you can work on your wedding is sensible; this avoids overspill into family or work time. 

Try not to take on more tasks than you can reasonably handle each Wednesday. In other words, you can avoid overworking by working less. Work smarter, not harder, as they say.

A SELF-IMPOSED WEDDING BAN 

It’s easy to let love and self-care take a back seat when you’re wedding planning. When things are getting too much, it’s time to step back and take some time out.

In times like these, allow yourself to go on a self-imposed wedding ban for a while. This not only means time out from wedding planning, it means not allowing yourself to think or talk about it too. If someone asks “how are the wedding plans going’’ simply tell them you’re taking some time out of planning. Let them figure out the rest!

While you’re on your self-imposed wedding ban, try to adopt some new self-care habits that will help you cope with the stresses of wedding planning. Let us direct you to our article on 7 IDEAL self care routines to adopt today.

MAKE TIME FOR EACHOTHER

As reported by Bustle according to a new survey of 500 engaged and newlywed couples, “seven out of eight couples (96 percent) said wedding planning was stressful” Moreover, “43 percent of couples surveyed said wedding planning put a strain on their relationship”.

Since planning your big day can cause a lot of tension, it’s important to make time to go out with your partner and talk about something that isn’t wedding planning. Head to a gallery, go to the theatre, or simply a country walk, anything that will give you both time to decompress.

Read: 6 tips for stressing less in the lead up to your wedding

JUST THE TWO OF YOU

And if all else fails…you could always elope! Indeed, choosing to elope instead of dealing with the headache of planning your wedding, eloping is a chic and discreet option that is becoming more and more common, particularly in a potentially post-pandemic world.

Speaking of which, check out these 5 considerations for couples getting engaged in 2021. Oh, and can we expect our invitation in the post?

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