Modern day baby showers are a tradition that began in the post-war USA, a celebration of new life and a show of support for expectant parents.
Their introduction to UK culture has been a much more recent development and, accordingly, getting invited to a baby shower can be a source of some confusion for guests. How should I respond to the invitation? What time should I arrive? Is it shots of tequila and chatting in the kitchen until dawn? To help you navigate this special occasion, we’ve pulled together this comprehensive guide to baby shower etiquette, British style. Let’s do this…
The Invitation
Receiving a baby shower invitation is a clear indication that you hold a special place in the parents-to-be’s hearts. They’re inviting you to share in their joy and anticipation of their new arrival. It’s not a summons, but a warm request for your presence.
When you receive the invitation, it’s important to RSVP promptly. This not only shows your respect for the effort the host is putting into organising the celebration, but it also helps them plan the event better. If you can’t attend, a polite decline with a brief explanation is appreciated. It’s also a nice gesture to send a card or a gift, even if you can’t make it.
The Perfect Present
Choosing the right gift for a baby shower can be a daunting task. While it’s easy to be swayed by adorable baby clothes, remember that babies outgrow them quickly. Instead, opt for something that will be useful for a longer period.
Items like baby care essentials, a nappy changing kit, a baby swing, or a baby carrier are practical and will be appreciated by the parents. Books are a wonderful choice too, as they can be used for bedtime stories for years to come.
If you’re unsure, a gift voucher for a reputable baby store is a safe bet. It allows the parents to choose what they need most. Remember, the value of your gift lies in the thought you put into it, not the price tag.
The Dress Code
Baby showers are generally relaxed events, but it’s always best to check the invitation for any dress code. If none is mentioned, a smart-casual outfit is usually a safe choice.
Avoid wearing anything too extravagant or uncomfortable. Remember, the focus of the day is the mum-to-be and the upcoming arrival, not fashion statements.
The Venue
The venue of the baby shower can greatly influence its atmosphere and etiquette. If the baby shower is hosted at someone’s home, the event is likely to be more intimate and casual. In this case, offer to help the host with setting up or cleaning up. It’s a small gesture that can go a long way.
On the other hand, if the organiser has spent good time searching the absolutely typical ‘places to have a baby shower near me’ Google entry, and the event is held at a hired venue, it might be a bit more formal. Make sure to respect the venue’s rules and be mindful of other guests. Remember, whether it’s a home or a hired venue, the focus should always be on celebrating the upcoming arrival and making the parents-to-be feel loved and supported.
The Arrival
Arriving on time for a baby shower is crucial. Late arrivals can disrupt the event’s flow and cause unnecessary stress for the host. Aim to arrive 10-15 minutes early. This gives you time to settle in, greet the host, and mingle with other guests before the event officially starts.
The Gift Opening
During the baby shower, there’s usually a time set aside for the parents-to-be to open the gifts. This can be a fun and exciting part of the event, as everyone gets to see the thoughtful gifts. It’s important to react positively and enthusiastically, regardless of the gift being opened (yes, some of them may be pretty – very – cringe). Remember, it’s the thought that counts.
The Food & Drink
Baby showers often feature a spread of food and drink. While it’s not a formal meal, it’s still important to show good manners. Wait until the host invites everyone to start eating, take a modest portion initially, and remember to compliment the host on the food.
If alcohol is served, it’s crucial to drink responsibly. This isn’t an event where getting smashed, jumping on the kitchen counter and singing George Michael is (necessarily) tolerated.
The Games
Baby shower games are a tradition designed to foster camaraderie and keep guests entertained. They range from guessing the baby’s weight to a nappy changing race.
Even if you’re not a fan of such games, participate with enthusiasm. It’s all in good fun and helps create a lively, memorable event. Plus, you might even win a prize!
The Departure
Knowing when to leave a baby shower can be a bit tricky. You don’t want to be the first to leave, but you also don’t want to overstay your welcome. A good rule of thumb is to stay at least until after the gifts have been opened.
If the party seems to be winding down, that’s your cue to say your goodbyes; this isn’t a ”one for the road” type of function. Make sure to thank the host before you leave and express your excitement for the new arrival.
The Thank You Note
After the baby shower, it’s customary for the parents-to-be to send thank you notes. This is their way of expressing gratitude for your presence and presents. If you receive one, no response is necessary. It’s simply a token of appreciation.
The Follow-Up
That said – though certainly not an obligatory response to that note – it’s a nice gesture to send a pretty excessive, gushing message to the parents-to-be or the host, thanking them for the invitation and expressing how much you enjoyed the event. This not only shows your appreciation but also reinforces your support for them during this exciting time.
The Bottom Line
Baby shower etiquette doesn’t have to be complicated. It’s all about being respectful, thoughtful, and considerate. Here’s to new beginnings and the joy they bring!
