For even the most extroverted, experienced first-dater, finding things to talk about on that inaugural meet-up can be tough. Play it safe and remain in your comfort zone, and you risk not letting your true personality shine; overcompensate for your lack of confidence, and there’s a danger you’ll overstep the mark and say something outrageous. We’ve all been there…
There are only so many ways you can phrase ‘so, do you come here often?’, but fear not; if you’re not too comfortable with the ebb and flow of flirtatious first date conversational sparring, there are venues and activities just perfect for a couple a little lost for ice-breakers. With that in mind, here are 5 first date ideas for those who find small talk difficult.
Visit A Comedy Club
If you find small talk difficult, then how about you outsource the jokes and banter to a professional. Yep, we’re talking about watching a stand up comedy show, where you can sit side-by-side with your partner, take in the performance, and share a few drinks and laughs as the ultimate social lubricant.
Don’t let that Dutch courage go to your head, however. Heckling at a comedy club is never wise, particularly on a first date. No prospective partner is going to enjoy watching you humiliated from the stage. Unless that’s something you’re both into, of course…
Take A Class Together
It can be a real bonding experience on a first date for you to both embark on a voyage of discovery and hopefully learn a new skill. Since taking a class together is such a hands-on type of date, you’ll have plenty of opportunities for conversation starters and ice breakers. You might even impress your date with your adaptability and aptitude.
Some of the most popular classes for first dates include cooking and arts classes (particularly sculpture or pottery), but for the most brave first-daters among us, a dance class is the ideal opportunity to get close with each other.
These generally involve a few basic steps of a particular dance, like the tango, waltz, or salsa. Some classes have a live band or DJ playing the music, which can make it even more exciting… Where do we sign up?
Find A Restaurant Where You Can Sit Side-By-Side
Let’s face it, keeping up a chat for the course of a meal is sometimes tough. Whether it be the consummating of a dating app conversation or the monotonous, weekly ‘date night’ of a married couple whose flame has long burnt out, awkward silences can be a pain in the backside and a real mood killer.
If that backside is parked on a bar stool however, overlooking the hustle, bustle and theatre of an open kitchen, conversation starters shouldn’t be a problem.
We’ve detailed a few of the best restaurants in Central London for side-by-side, open kitchen dining here. Do check them out for inspiration on a great date night idea for those who find small talk difficult.
Consider A Competitive Date Night
Many fear the prospect of sitting across from each other in a restaurant, attempting to strike up a friendly, flirty conversation in an environment akin to a job interview. Others find it understandably difficult to get that initial spark to ignite when sitting in silence in a cinema, theatre or concert. Indeed, it’s any wonder traditional relationships ever got off the ground when conducted in such romance-sapping settings.
Dates with a little competition involved are always fun and frivolous, and represent a great litmus test for any chemistry between you. Moreover, they provide natural breaks and prompts in conversation, awkwardness is easier to navigate, and the spirit of rivalry fosters a connection between the two that naturally leads to flirting.
You can also see how someone reacts to winning and losing, which is hugely important – if they scream in your face and do a little dance or victory lap…well, perhaps ghosting is allowed on this occasion.
A Bike Ride
If you feel more comfortable on two wheels than two feet, then why not head out on your bikes and cycle to nearby villages for a first date with a difference? There are so many incredible things to explore in the countryside – from churches to castles, lakes to woodlands, and often the areas closest to us remain those least familiar.
You could also check out a few nearby pubs along the way; a pub cycle-crawl, if you will. Pop in for a drink or two (remember your alcohol limits) and enjoy a change of scenery. Bliss.
A long and leisurely bike ride for a first date helps control the flow of conversation gently, and also helps you check out your prospective partner’s stamina, which could be useful!