Your wedding can be a wonderful affair where you and your favourite people gather together, have fun and celebrate the magic that is love and a slightly better tax situation.
It can also be a day of stress and headaches where nothing goes quite right; Aunt Linda gets drunk and gives too much affection to your spouse’s cousin, the best man’s speech mentions that chaotic stag-do and ends up offending everyone, and someone chokes on an overly sticky toffee pudding.
Much of this stress seems to emanate from the sacred traditions that hang over an event and the (sometimes) stuffiness with which they’re observed. The solution? Do things your way! Here are 6 ideas that will spruce up a conventional wedding way.
Change Up Traditional Roles
In traditional weddings, there are roles played by people of certain ages or genders, and choosing the right people for the right roles can be fraught with stress and pressure.
It doesn’t have to be this way. Every family and friendship group is a slightly different size or shape, and that’s okay, so if you feel like it, do away with traditional roles; have the best woman or a man-of-honour if the bride or groom’s best friend happens to be of the opposite sex.
Allow for groomswomen, have the bride walked down the aisle by their bestie, have your grandmother be a flower girl and your dog serve as the ringbearer or get the maid-of-honours to do the speeches.
Put the people you’re closest with in the roles that matter; there are no rules against doing this. And even if there were? It’s your wedding!
Accept that your squad doesn’t match the 1900s postcard of what a social group should be and share your day with the people you love, whatever their gender or age.
Set The Tone With An Alternative Dress Code
Whilst it’s certainly fun to get dressed up once in a while, the usual cocktail dresses and lounge suits, or black tie dress code, isn’t the only way for everyone to look stylish and sophisticated on your wedding day.
Set the tone with an alternative wedding dress; we love the idea of a wedding jumpsuit, embroidered outfit, or even a red wedding dress… The choice is yours!
In fact, as Today reports, you can get seriously creative with your dress code. A few examples of ‘’quirky wedding dress codes’’ they give include:
- Bohemian black tie
- Farmhouse chic
- California casual
- Fancy ranch
- Brooklyn formal
- Or, simply, ‘fabulous’
Of course, making sure the wedding party is comfortable is the most important part of any dress code, so don’t ask for people to turn up in shorts for a winter wedding, or wear crushed velvet for a beach event!
Write Your Own Vows
Taking the time to craft your own wedding vows can help make the occasion extremely personal. No relationship is the same, and this means the depth and implications of your promise to keep choosing each other again and again as the years pass and your personalities change won’t be the same either.
Do a little research on writing vows, sure, but then start from the heart. Any writer will tell you that the first draft of anything isn’t great. Write all your feelings down in a stream-of-consciousness sort of way, and then start organising what you’ve written into different categories.
Rewrite the vows and then put them away for a week. Revisit the vows and rewrite them again. Giving yourself space between each revision will allow you to detach from the writing enough to know what to cut. Then read the vows out loud, and tweak words that feel odd when spoken. This will help you get the voice right; you want the words to sound like you.
Read: Contemporary ideas to add wow to your wedding vows
Cut Out Anything That Doesn’t Bring You Joy
Traditional weddings are filled with a whole list of activities and elements, boxes to be ticked and customs to be observed.
There’s nothing stopping you removing anything from your Big Day that you don’t love. If you don’t like making speeches, don’t. If you hate the idea of your new husband removing your garter with his teeth, don’t do that. If the idea of the first dance in front of everyone you know makes you break out in a cold sweat, skip that too. This is your wedding. You don’t have to do things the way other people do them.
Likewise, feel free to add things that you do love. Incorporating elements of your personal romance into the event can add magic to the day. Let’s say you two met during a board game night at a friend’s place? Maybe you might want to include board games in your wedding day as this is where you fell in love.
Of course, there are a few traditional wedding elements that are worth spending your budget on, but even those are open to interpretation.
Choose A Location That Is Special To You
Maybe you and your partner have a favourite hiking trail? Perhaps your happiest memories as a couple are on your grandparents’ farm? Or, did you share your first date in a popular local restaurant?
Why not choose a wedding venue that is special to you as a couple for the site of your celebration? It’s a lot easier to organise a wedding at an unusual location than you’d think. As a bonus, it’s often free to get married at a public location. Of course, you need to be prepared for people who are using the space to wander by and stop to watch for a moment, but that’s all part of the fun, don’t you think?
Eschew Traditional Wedding Rings
You can even opt to eschew traditional wedding rings in favour or something more alternative and interesting. Rather than keep you (we realise you’ve got lots of wedding planning to do), why not check out our guide to some alternatives to traditional wedding rings. You won’t regret it (well, maybe you will)!
The Bottom Line
By doing away with the customs and traditions you’re not fond of, you can spruce up a conventional wedding day into something truly unique and spectacular. Remember, this day is about celebrating you and your partner’s love, and that’s the most important thing!