There are two types of people in this world; those with immaculately clean cars with that ‘just-out-of-the-showroom’ feel, and those who are jealous of people with immaculately clean cars with that ‘just-out-of-the-showroom’ feel. 

If you fall into the latter category, we have news for you; your dirty car might be damaging your friendships and even your love life. According to research, when it comes to relationships, 7 in 10 believe having a dirty car is a turn-off, whilst 23% have even ended a relationship with someone because of their filthy vehicle. 

But we didn’t need some hastily assembled stats to tell you that, did we? Because it’s obvious; a sparkling clean, well maintained car can say a lot about a person, and if you’re looking for tips on how to keep your car clean, here are 5 of them.

START FROM THE OUTSIDE IN

Let’s face it; cleaning your car is a game of two halves. Polishing up the exterior, buffing the alloys, cleaning the windows…these largely aesthetic needs are fuelled by pride and a desire to look good. What’s more, cleaning the outside of your car can be really satisfying. The inside…not so much. 

So, start with the exterior, as a way to get into the cleaning groove and build yourself up for the more laborious, tedious inside job. It’s time to pull out the shampoo, brushes, and hot water and prepare to give your car a thorough scrub down, but it’s also important to protect your paintwork, and this is best done by removing any dust, dirt and debris that might be chipping away at it. 

Ideally, you should buy cleaning supplies that have wax protecting qualities to ensure longevity on your car’s finish. In fact, you should always ensure that you have the right car cleaning equipment for your vehicle; using the wrong cleaning supplies can affect your car’s paintwork. At this point, it might be worth considering professional valeting services, of course, who can broadly guarantee expert-level maintenance (meaning no damage!) of your car’s exterior. 

MARIE KONDO YOUR CAR

Once your car is gleaming from the outside, it’s time to tackle what lies within. Your car should firstly be free from clutter; it’s not going to bring you (or any passengers) joy if it’s full of old KFC boxes, receipts and spare sweaters.

Channel the work of organisational consultant Marie Kondo here, and streamline your car’s interiors to contain only what you truly need. In the spirit of streamlining, we won’t say any more on the subject.

EQUIPMENT TO KEEP IN YOUR BOOT

Yep, we realise we recommended a thorough decluttering of the superfluous stuff that lies within your vehicle, but there are some items that are essential to always have in your car if you’re going to keep it clean. Here are six things you should always keep in the boot:

Image taken from www.onlinecarparts.co.uk 

We know what you’re thinking; won’t a normal towel do? Aren’t detailing brushes just reserved for experts? Well, no. Compared with cotton, J-cloth and the like, microfibre towels are much softer, more absorbent and less abrasive, meaning that they won’t damage your car’s surface or interior’s sheen. Moreover, they are long lasting, meaning they represent a worthwhile investment. 

A chamois cloth is incredibly useful for similar reasons; when made of genuine chamois leather, they possess almost no abrasive properties and are incredibly absorbent, perfect for the final touch of cleaning both outside and inside your car.

When it comes to a detailing brush, these brushes will help you get into nooks and crannies of AC vents and wheels that would be unreachable if you were just going to use a toothbrush. 

An ice scraper has obvious benefits, helping you clear off a frosty morning’s remnants with efficiency, but did you know the tool has uses about the home, too? You can use an ice scraper to remove wax from skis and splattered paint from walls after a DIY job, as well as smoothing wood filler. In fact, the ice scraper is such a useful, versatile tool that it’s worth buying two…one for your car and one for DIY around the house!

We won’t embarrass you by suggesting you need an air freshener in your car, but one never hurts for emergencies, right?

FIND YOUR INCENTIVE

Not only can a dirty car be a massive turn off to other people, but scratches, stains and even smells may make prospective buyers think twice as they give the impression that your car hasn’t been looked after, a red flag for more serious problems, perhaps.  

According to research from Nottingham University, car interiors are a breeding ground for microorganisms and bacteria, including E Coli and Bacillus cereus. Shocking stuff.  

That said, it’s very unlikely you’ll get ill from the microbes from your car as we are always surrounded by microorganisms and most people’s immune systems can handle them. So next time you get into your car full of old food wrappers, used tissues and water bottles full of stagnant water, imagine that you’re in a cesspool of bacteria. 

If self-image, money and microbes aren’t enough of a catalyst to keep your car clean, perhaps there’s a bigger problem afoot here. Find your incentive, and keep it in mind while you’re scrubbing and polishing…

MAKE CLEANING A SUNDAY RITUAL 

We know, you probably have better things to do on a Sunday, like going to the car boot sale or out to brunch with your pals. But wouldn’t you rather attend these events in a clean car? 

We don’t think we’re going too far by saying a freshly detailed car isn’t just going to look good; it can also make you feel good. 

Why not reconceptualise the way you think about cleaning your car and turn it into a relaxing, therapeutic stretch of ‘me time’? Free from distraction and with only a chamois cloth in your hand, allow yourself to feel as though you’re off the leash, able to listen to all your own music, a podcast, or even have the football or an episode of Friends on in the background. 

Make cleaning a Sunday ritual with benefits, and over time, you’ll learn to be excited about this portion of the week that you get all to yourself.

Now, where’s my detailing brush? I could’ve sworn I left it around here somewhere…

‘’It’s not you, it’s me’’. Whilst being dumped undoubtedly hurts like hell, let’s put the shoe on the other foot for a minute; breaking up with someone is never easy, either. If you really care for the person, ending the relationship can be harder still, bringing with it a mixture of guilt, self-doubt and concern for the other party.

In some cases, these feelings can last for a significant stretch of time, clouding future judgment and leaving both parties feeling unable to move on. If it’s likely that your ex is pretending to be over you and they’re displaying telltale signs of being powerless to forgive and forget, then, fortunately, there are some ways to help your ex move on from your relationship. Here are 6 of them.

EXPLAIN WHY THE RELATIONSHIP ENDED 

Reeling off the cliches can be painful to hear; ‘’I love you, I’m just not in love with you’’; ‘’You deserve better’’; ‘’We can still be friends’’; ‘’Maybe we can try again one day’’. Things like this only serve to offer false hope and that glimmer only leads to more heartache later down the line.

Instead, calmly and politely, even clinically, explain to your ex the reasons why the relationship ended, from both sides and without criticism or judgment. Of course, this is a conversation that needs to be approached with the most delicate of touches; make sure it takes place in a neutral setting, ideally in public and certainly without alcohol. Use logic and rationality, rather than emotional language, and don’t apportion blame.

This sensible approach will confirm gently but firmly that you’ve moved on, and will demonstrate that it’s best if your ex does the same. Years later, they’ll be grateful for your objective, dispassionate stance.

YOU PROBABLY CAN’T JUST BE FRIENDS RIGHT NOW 

The urge to keep in touch with an ex can be powerful. However, as Vox explains, “When people see their ex-partner, they tend to feel more sad (not fun!) and also more in love with their ex (possibly fun, but not useful for moving on)”.

If your partner still isn’t over your time together, you risk stunting their personal growth and prolonging their distress and longing.

Even if you’d still like to be friends in the future, it’s important to give your ex space to regain their independence. It also gives you time to focus on yourself, and that’s important, too. Just because you were the one who ended the relationship, doesn’t mean you won’t be struggling to come to terms with a different future, too.

GIVE THEM PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL SPACE

It’s hard to see someone you care about hurting and you may feel responsible for the way they are feeling. But it’s important to give them both physical and emotional space; otherwise, you risk elongating their mourning. 

As a couple, your lives would have been intertwined and it’s best to untangle things to allow for both of you to move on. 

It’s important to consider mutual stomping grounds. If you frequent the same supermarket or drink in the same pub, you should consider changing your routines and habits to avoid an uncomfortable, accidental meeting. Should you remain close with the same friendship circles, endeavour to manage meetings together so you’re not inadvertently thrust into the same room on a Friday night.

And though this should go without saying, if you are the one who initiated the break up, for heaven’s sake, don’t have a moment of weakness after a glass or two of wine and message them out of the blue. You owe them the space and distance.

DON’T GIVE THEM FALSE HOPE

If, after some time apart, you’d like to try to be friends, be sure not to fall into old habits which may inadvertently lead them on, like holding their arm while you walk or texting them a little too late into the evening. If you do re-enter the friend zone, establish clear boundaries in that clinical way we encouraged earlier to avoid confusion.

ENCOURAGE THEM TO “FIND THEMSELVES’’

After a break up, we often feel confused about our sense of identity, which has been so firmly and inextricably linked to the other person. A part of us, even a whole of us, can feel bereft and those who have been through a particularly traumatic break up often describe the sense of ‘something missing’ or being ‘torn away’.

Your ex may be feeling this way, but try to encourage them to reframe the break up into an opportunity. After a split, we often rediscover parts of our identity that had been neglected because they didn’t neatly fit in with our partner’s personality, and sometimes, this can be exciting, revealing new opportunities and a sense of hope for both parties. 

DON’T FORGET TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, TOO

You’re going through a difficult time, too. There’s a whole lot of acrimony and formality in life events like this, and sometimes it can be easy to forget that you have a life to get on with. Try to surround yourself with friends and family who will boost your self-esteem and listen to you without trying to tell you what to do. 

You do not need to spend time with people who bring you down or try to keep you dwelling on the past and wallowing in self-pity. Look after yourself following the break up, and eventually, things will look a little rosier.

Read: Life after divorce: How to embrace (and even enjoy) this new chapter of your life

THE BOTTOM LINE

Time heals. As explained in the Independent, “According to research published in The Journal of Positive  Psychology, it takes 11 weeks to feel better after a relationship ends. But a separate study found it takes closer to 18 months to heal from the end of a marriage”

So while you feel guilty now, know that they will move on and be happy again, just do what you can to make the process as easy on them as possible.  

And the IDEAL ways to solve them

Back at the end of 2020, at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, it was reported that the crisis had led to a spike in breakups and divorces. British charity Citizen’s Advice revealed that views of their page on ‘getting a divorce’ had risen 25% on the previous year, with a ‘divorce boom’ forecast for the coming years.

It’s not just the collective trauma of the pandemic and its isolation that has brought about a strain on so many relationships. Related stress concerning health, job insecurities and money have also played a part. 

We’re here today to look at the latter of those three because in just about every survey going, ‘money’ is ranked as the number one thing couples argue about. If that sounds all too familiar, then here are the most common reasons couples argue about money and the IDEAL ways to solve them.

WHAT’S YOURS ISN’T MINE

Jealousy can ruin a relationship, that’s long been accepted. But what’s less acknowledged is that jealously regarding money is almost as prolific within relationships as jealously about another man or woman. They don’t call it the green eyed monster for nothing…

This is often caused by an imbalance in earnings between the two, and manifests itself in something of a power struggle concerning who should be in control of the household finances. 

This imbalance can often be addressed by the use of a shared bank account or a shared budget between the couple, and an acceptance of – regardless of earnings – ‘what’s mine is yours’.

VIEWING FINANCIAL BEHAVIOURS AS A DEFINING CHARACTER TRAIT

Psychologists suggest that there are broadly 7 money personality types. But whilst some experts believe that identifying which you are can help you have a healthier relationship with spending, when couples try to attribute these personality types to their partners, problems arise.

When one half of a relationship views the other’s thrift or frivolousness as a defining character trait, arguments often follow. This is because behaviours around money can be used as a weapon in quarrels and as a tool of criticism.

Anyway, you were wondering what those types were, right?

• The Compulsive Saver
• The Compulsive Spender
• The Compulsive Moneymaker
• The Indifferent-to-Money
• The Saver-Splurger
• The Gambler
• The Worrier

Instead of attributing these rather pseudo-scientific types to your partner (and inadvertently causing a row), it’s a better idea to discuss your spending and saving habits as being couple’s traits. That way, you can work through compulsive or habitual issues together, as a team.

INVESTING WITHOUT CONSULTING YOUR PARTNER

When it comes to making any sort of financial decision, it is important to make sure you always consult your partner. 

After all, decisions both big and small should be made as a team, and when considering investments, this means that the burden of responsibility is shouldered should things go wrong. If you go forward and make an investment without your partner being aware, not only are you risking taking all the blame should money be lost, but you’re also complicit in a betrayal.

On the flip side, when cooperating on investments as a team, you’ll gain greater clarity of perspective. What is your attitude to risk? Does this align with your partner’s view? What investment opportunities are right for your circumstances? Should you buy Bitcoin or would you be better off opting for something less volatile, such as a Nutmeg account? 

When making any investments, it’s best to first consult your partner, particularly if the money is coming from a shared bank account.

KEEPING FINANCIAL SECRETS

On a final note, if you keep secrets of any kind, this can cause major issues in a relationship. 

This is even more so the case when it comes to important matters that affect the both of you quite so implicitly, like money. You can find yourself on a very slippery journey to financial infidelity if you keep secrets concerning money, and it is only going to get worse if, for example, you dip into your savings without telling your partner and then your boiler breaks, requiring immediate investment? That’s a very awkward confessional that could lead to long term relationship damage.

To avoid this, the message is simple; always be honest with your partner. 

THE BOTTOM LINE

So there you have it; these are some of the most challenging money problems in any relationship. It is important to recognise that all relationships experience problems in some shape or form. However, it is how you work through them and overcome these issues that really matter. Acting as a team and being honest will make all of the difference. 

Oh, and if you’re still intent on staring into the abyss of your computer screen looking for answers about your relationship, you may just find them here.