Ideal for those countries soon heading for Summer.

Yep, we know what you’re thinking. ‘Stay cool in bed? We’ve just put the heating on!’. But spare a thought for your cousins in the Southern Hemisphere, with summer on the horizon, or those friends of ours closer to the Equator and in a perpetual state of warm weather. They deserve to feel cool, too.

In a study by the US National Library of Medicine, it was concluded that sleeping in climates between 36°C and 38°C (96.8°F and 100.4°F) was significantly worse than resting in an environment ranging between 32°C and 28°C (89.6°F and 82.4°F), for instance. Pretty obvious, huh?

In fact, the optimal room temperature for sweet, undisturbed sleep is considered to be ‘’a cool 16-18°C (60-65°F), with temperatures over 24°C (71°F) likely to cause restlessness, while a cold room of about 12°C (53°F) will make it difficult to drop off’’, according to The Sleep Council. 

With that running through our minds as they hit the pillow, here are 5 ways to stay cool in bed, IDEAL for those countries heading for Summer.

MATTRESS MAGIC

The choice you make when buying your mattress truly matters. Mattresses absorb body heat during the night, and some materials retain the warmth more than others, with plush and memory foam beds known to be the worst offenders for hot sleepers. 

This is because, in general, you sink in more to these types of beds, which means more of your surface area is touching the mattress. This will result in more heat produced and an uncomfortable rest. Luckily, some specific beds are designed for cooling, which will help tremendously during the summer.

WEAR THE RIGHT CLOTHES 

Our body temperature plays a major part in regulating our circadian rhythm, which in turn affects how easily we fall asleep, how deeply we spend that sleep, and how seamless the wake up is, too. Best get that body temperature correct, right at the source, then, by wearing loose fitting nightwear made from cotton; it’s lightweight, more breathable, and will absorb moisture to stop us waking up feeling sweaty and sticky. All of this ensures a more comfortable slumber.

That said, research has consistently concluded that sleeping in nothing but our birthday suit is best. No need to invest in new PJs, then! 

TAKE A COLD SHOWER AT NIGHT

If you’re already hot before you get into bed, you’ll likely be even warmer once you get under the covers. Before resting, try taking a cold shower to reduce your overall body temperature. 

When you go to bed, you’ll feel refreshed, and your sheets won’t get drenched with sweat (providing you’ve dried yourself thoroughly first, of course!). Your body will naturally rise in heat as the night goes on in hotter climates, so do all you can to keep it cool just before sleep. 

KEEP WINDOWS OPEN

If you don’t have air conditioning, an excellent way to keep air flowing in your room is by keeping the windows open. During the day, you’ll get fresh air circulating through, so it won’t turn into an oven. Then, during the night, the fresh breeze will keep things cooler. For even more airflow, use a fan to help take the heat out of your room. You can attach it right to your window, so the crisp night breeze is welcomed in.

KEEP THE LIGHTS OFF

Light bulbs give off heat, and even though it’s a little, it can make a difference. Try keeping things dark at night if possible, then. If the sun shines into your bedroom during the day, use shades or curtains to block the rays from getting into your room. 

It’s also known that bright lights can disturb your circadian rhythm, which makes it harder to sleep. Being in a low lit environment an hour or so before bed will activate your brain to produce melatonin, which is the sleep hormone. 

USE AN ICEPACK

If you’re still struggling to stay refreshed at night, you can use an ice pack. Before bed, take it out of the freezer, wrap it in a towel, and then bring it to your room. 

When you’re lying down, you can place it on your forehead, the nape of your neck or stomach for best results. If you need instant relief, put it on your pulse points. Those include your wrists, elbows, groin, neck, behind your knees, and your ankles. 

If you don’t have an ice pack, you can always use a frozen water bottle. When it starts to melt, you’ll have cold water right by your bed!

THE BOTTOM LINE

Being comfortable and cool while sleeping will ensure you get proper rest and a deeper sleep for longer. During the hot summer months, it can be hard to stay refreshed at night. Our top tips are to buy a cooling mattress, take a cold shower, keep your windows open, keep the lights off, and use an ice pack should help with that. Good luck and we’ll see you back here tomorrow, bright eyed and bushy tailed!

In an ideal world, we would get along; a gentle procession through life, holding hands with strangers and soundtracked by Kumbayah. 

If only things were that easy. We all have our own unique mental and emotional issues that can express themselves in various ways, much of the time, unskillfully and without much understanding or awareness. That is not the best situation for anyone, and it isn’t very constructive.  

Wouldn’t it be better if we had some practical technique that we could store in your ‘relationship toolbox’ to use as and when the situation required it? Tools that would be useful for understanding how other people think and feel (empathy), or understanding our own reactions better so that we can respond to difficult people and situations with kindness and love. The good news is that these tools do exist, and if you learn about them and practice with them, they will become sharper and more effective over time. 

There are those tools; our 5 ways to improve your communication with others.

LEARN TO ACCEPT THEM

Do you have a difficult person in your life who you struggle to communicate with for one reason or another? It might be a partner, coworker, friend, or family member. If they are negative towards us or difficult in general, it can have a toxic effect on the quality of our life and wellbeing. It can cause unnecessary stress, anxiety, and confusion. But having difficult people might be easier than we realize with the right attention and communication techniques. 

One of the best ways to alleviate the stress and anxiety of having difficult people in our lives is to learn to accept them for who they are. We are all different. We all have different personalities, sensitivities, and attributes. We might want life to be harmonious with everybody, but in reality, that’s never going to happen. Accepting that we may not be compatible with some people and that we may never truly get along takes the pressure off. It allows people to be themselves and not worry about building unnecessary relationships. 

If the person, however, is close but also difficult, learn to accept them for who they are. Try to understand that they cannot help being that person and reacting in their own way. Just like us, they have their own issues and difficulties to work with, so stand back and let them work it out themselves. Developing this kind of understanding of other people can be a powerful way of communicating and interacting harmoniously with even the most troubling personalities.

TURN NEGATIVES INTO POSITIVES 

Have you been in a situation when somebody has said or done something hurtful? It might be a colleague, friend, or relative. How did you feel, and how did you respond? Chances are it caused you to feel hurt, annoyed, frustrated, irritated, and reactive. Depending on how sensitive you are, a negative comment or opinion can stick with you for days or weeks and become like an illness. That’s why it’s so important to process this negativity and learn from it.  

Usually, when this happens, the person making that negative comment or opinion will be looking for a reaction from you – that’s partly why they behave the way they do – so don’t rise to the bait. Even if you feel insulted or hurt, don’t show it. Instead, ignore it but make a mental note of the comment and how you felt about it for later. On reflection, explore what it was that made this comment so impactful. Understanding the reasons behind our emotional reactions will lead us to a deeper understanding of ourselves. 

The comments and opinions of others may not be very nice, and they might come from a negative place. But that doesn’t have to mean they can’t be used in a positive way. It may not happen overnight, but if you use this negativity to understand yourself better, it will mean that the next time you encounter that situation, you will be better resourced to handle it. In time the comments and opinions will cease to have any effect on you, and they will likely stop.

DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY

We’ve all been in arguments. We know what they’re like; unwanted, heated, usually preventable. Often arguments start from a misunderstanding about people and situations. A button is pressed, and something is said that is deeply felt or unintended. During arguments, passion can run high, and often we part with a sense of ill-will and confusion. But if we don’t act skillfully in the wake of an argument, it can have a hugely detrimental effect on our mental and emotional wellbeing. Handling things carefully and appropriately, then, is vital. 

The first thing to do is understand that the argument is probably the result of a misunderstanding. Also, remember that in one way or another, there is a way to resolve the situation through your efforts and theirs. Spend some time reflecting on what happened. Even if something was said that you find hurtful, try not to take it personally. Later, when you are both calm, you can decompress with the other person involved. 

Be like a scientist falsifying a theory, and question the validity of the theory continually until you get a solid answer. Go back over the argument and put yourself in that other person’s position. Ask yourself where they are coming from, and if their position has any value or validity. Probably it will have. If you can understand their point of view, their values, and motivations, you have a better chance of finding a solution that works for both of you.

BE AWARE OF EMOTIONS 

When we’re happy, we smile, and when we’re angry, we frown. We all have emotions that we instinctively react to when we encounter them. It’s easy to think that there’s nothing we can do about the way emotions rise up and seem to engulf us, but that is not the case. Some people have high degrees of emotional intelligence and are able to stand back from the emerging emotion, detach themselves from it, and respond with calmness. 

If you think this ability will be impossible for you to learn, then think again. It might be hard to master, but you can understand the mechanism fairly easily and put it into practice right away. The first thing to do is understand that they are two parts of you. There’s the mental part, and there’s the emotional part. The two parts work together autonomously, but if you bring awareness from the mental part to the emotional part, it separates them in a useful way. 

Let’s say you’re in work, and your manager is criticizing you for a project you worked hard on. You might begin to feel stress, annoyance, or frustration arising. This is the emotional part. Use the mental part to label the emotion. A useful phrase to say is ‘’anger is arising’’. The anger that is arising suddenly becomes separate from your mental side and seems to walk over you as a wave might. It is then gone, at least for now.  

COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY 

The importance of effective communication cannot be understated. Communication is the way that we understand each other’s ideas – which may be very different from our own. Understanding someone else’s ideas allows us to harmonize and live healthy lives free from conflict. But what is effective communication, and how can we practice it in our own lives. This section will attempt to address these questions and give you an effective technique that you can use right away to improve your relationships. 

To improve your communication, it’s a good idea to learn and practice emotional intelligence and how to avoid taking things personally. But to communicate effectively with someone in the moment, you also need to understand body language. There is no point in apologizing if you are still angry, for instance. The anger will come across in your voice and won’t sound genuine. In a situation like this, it’s better to put the conversation off until another time. Simply say that you’re still feeling angry or raw about it and ask if you can talk about it some other time. 

If, however, you are ready to communicate with a difficult person, you need to be as clear as possible about what is bothering you and how it is affecting you. Statements such as, when you do ‘this,’ it makes me feel like ‘this,’ are very useful for getting a skillful conversation underway. The goal is always understanding. Good communication leads to understanding, and understanding is the foundation of harmonious relationships.